The year end review has been a tradition at The Grumpy Owl since the days before it was all erased. Back way back when it was just The Grumpy Owl, before it became The Grumpy Owl Redux. The aughts and all that. Bit harder to do lately, though. Time's gone a bit wonky.
A few things happened. My wife caught Covid. (DON'T SAY IT, OAKLEY - NOT ONE DAY BEFORE RETIREMENT!) But I managed to avoid catching it for another year.
We went through some other stress. We were forced to move, changing apartments, and got into a legal knockdown fight with Wife's former boss. That's ongoing and will be going on for a while. But, so far, it all seems to all be going in our favor. So far, so good. Knock on wood.
This post is starting to feel increasingly jinxy.
I gave up the gym and took up jogging. Dropped some weight and bulk without losing anything noticeable in my functional strength. Went down from 83kg to 77.6 (today).
I also, finally, managed to get to the beach, where I did some swimming.
All in all, I feel like this year contained my best adjustment to the summer. Having learned that the humidity melted me down to some proto-me punk form, I was a bit better prepared for it. Preparation allowed me to avoid the worst of it and accept the rest. I also think the running may have helped acclimatize me, making it all more bearable.
I had a linen suit made, which worked out really well. Very happy with it.
I even feel like, for about two weeks during the summer, I had about my perfect life. Studied and did school when I woke up. Went for a run to the beach, where I swam and read, ran home, did chores, saw my wife in the evening, and, at night worked on a paid writing project, which was later published as Chimeric Herbarium.
That, to me, is just about a perfect day. I'd love that day to be my life but it's certainly not the sort of thing I expect from life. I just feel incredibly lucky to have enjoyed a couple weeks of that day on repeat. I knew it wouldn't last and it didn't but it was great while it did.
The big background to all this, of course, is this was the first year since 2022 where . . . How to put it? It was not a return to normal. It sure as fuck isn't post pandemic. And, Satan knows, we didn't emerge from the pandemic. That's not going to happen. We're not going to emerge from any problem or pandemic. It's all this and worse until we die. These are still The Good Old Days. What it was, I suppose --and this is not really catchy-- was a period of somewhat better functioning and more livable adjustments to an ongoing problem.
Masked, vaccinated, boosted, and cautious. Some sound and life returned to the city. Busan is still not as lively as it was when we arrived. Most of the neighborhood 24/7 places are still closed at midnight. There's a steady drumbeat of new death. Sickness takes more every day. A drone of silence in the gaps between. And a cough on the subway will never sound the same again. But some fireworks returned. There's some life in the place.
The year has largely been adjusting. Striking new balances, negotiating a novel environment, doing the same things in different ways and different things in the same ways. At times, it's been taxing, at other times, a relief. Doubtless, we've all gone a little mad.
I mean, fuck's sake, I seem to be more or less back online.
And I finally got around to changing my name, which I've been wanting to do since I was fifteen. I never liked the old one, not since I was a kid. But I could never figure out what the new one should be. I like this one. It feels much more like me, fits better, and it's nice and legal too. It is, actually, my name. Though, if you're in the habit of calling me by my old name, that's fine too. I view that as being more of a nickname.
All in all, I feel . . . Not optimistic about the the future, you know me too well for that. Rather, like some multiyear cycle has come to its end, sloughing off enough of its beginning ot be something different. Another weird orbit is just getting started. Another strange future born. It won't be any good but it'll do. It'll have to.
Also, I saw an owl.
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