A BDSM scene is something anyone interested in BDSM or part of the BDSM realm wants to create or participate in as soon as possible. Still, there are several things that need to be taken into consideration before you put on your latex and get your ropes prepped.

What is a BDSM scene?

A BDSM scene is a planned scene where BDSM types of play might include sexual activities like impact play, bondage, and sensation play. A scene is often centered around the submissives wants with pre-negotiated limits and boundaries set in place. A BDSM scene is a form of role-playing and requires the Do/me and sub to take on specific roles during the scene.

Negotiation and consent is crucial to everything related to BDSM; you need to discuss all of your and your partner's soft limits and hard limits thoroughly. Don't leave anything to misinterpretation as this way, and you will avoid crossing any lines and avoid confusion and hurt. As hard as it may be, it is also essential to discuss any past trauma with your partner as this may cause you or your partner to be triggered during a scene and help you identify the signs and stop play before it goes too far.

When planning a BDSM scene, ensure safety measures are in place depending on what type of play you will be engaging in during the BDSM scene. For instance, if you are engaging in rope bondage, make sure to have sharp scissors nearby if your partner is triggered or has a panic attack or if you are using cling wrap as bondage, have shears nearby in case your partner gets too hot during play. Another safety aspect for both of you is a safe word or signal/gesture that will slow down or stop play immediately; both your safety physically, emotionally, and mentally is of utmost importance.

A BDSM scene should not be spontaneous or a surprise; it should be planned and discussed beforehand with an agreed-upon date. Don't get me wrong spontaneous sex is hot AF with a bit of spanking or humiliation involved, but a properly planned BDSM scene is like a play; it has a start, climax, and ending. There is a plan in place where both partners' limits and boundaries are considered, and the scene is created around all of this.

When planning a BDSM scene, don't go overboard getting caught up in the small things. Remember K.I.S.S. (keep it simple stupid ๐Ÿ˜Š). If you are planning an impact play scene, you will warm up with spanking by hand and progress from there to flogging and then possibly caning; don't get caught up in what you will be wearing or what scented candle you should burn; the scene is about impact play.

Aftercare is a must, and aftercare can vary from different partners. One partner might want to cuddle and snack while coming back down, while another might want to be left alone so that they can process the scene and their feelings. This is normal but make sure to discuss both of your aftercare needs before a scene; this way, both partners understand the needs and expectations of each other, and they can provide aftercare to their partner.

Many people become interested in BDSM after reading erotic literature or watching certain movies or pornos, which is perfectly fine. Still, it is essential to remember there is a difference between fantasy and reality. As hot or tantalizing as your fantasies are, sometimes a fantasy is just that, a fantasy.